2004-11
13

Time for Me to Change

By xrspook @ 22:51:00 归类于:想当年的作业

When I read the lesson "How to Make a Good Impression", I know I have many places to change. To change my action, change my attitude, change my way of speak… All the things I must change, if I want to be a succeeful man. The behavious of mine are so terrible, it means I am not polite, though I am a girl, but it seems I am just a rule man.

The biggest thing I must change is my self-centre thought. It is not exit when I was young, but as I am grown up, the lonely day became more and more, and I didn't communicate with many people. I often stay in a place, keep silence, watch others but having no words to say. Too many time of solitude made my self-centre, because at that time, I didn't need to think about others. The only thing I care is myself.

I say "I" to often! Or you can say I think about myself too often . I often just focus on my own problems. Others' things are none of m business. I complain frequentlky, because of a tiny problem I will complain all day. Because of a cloudy day, because of some meetings, because of money problem, because I don't know how to finish my homework, because… Everday, everytime, everywhere I will complain, no matter who I complain to. Maybe I just moan in a little voice, more often I yell to others. My emotion is so strange, it not only drives myself crazy but also dirives others mad. In fact, I just take serious and I am no good at showing my feeling, so I express my feeling in a volient way, but the poor thing is only my good friends know this. I can control in my heart, but I can't control my actions either, that's my problem.

This horrible habit formed when I was in middle school, because of an unforgetable basketball match. In that match my class lost, but we couldn't stand the fact, we cried and started my first complain. From then on, my complains are just like the water in Changjiang River, can't stop, and became more and more frequently.

I have two pole of my emotion: silence and complain. I think I can change this situation, but I won't. The environment stay still, how cna I change myself?

The social won't let my naughty, and I don't want to be the strangest one. The own style of life is good, but if it's too many, it means naughty or cant't be liked. Hope I can change, it's the right time for me to change.

2004-11
12

意外破财

By xrspook @ 3:44:35 归类于:烂日记

Today, I can’t go home, it’s just the beginning of my bad luck. Because of the exercise of the Red Cross tomorrow morning, so every other week, I must stay in Wushan Apartment to spend the unwilling night.

At first, we were going to eat sweetmeat in Frenach, but when we got there, there had be so many people, the restaurant is carrying that you the sweetmeat buffet dinner 18 Yuan per person. The first aim we missed. We didn’t know where to eat or eating what. Then we went to the old place-DHR to have our supper. Still remembered it’s the first place we had our supper, at that time we also didn’t know where to eat or eating what. We had the same situation, the same choice and the same feeling. It just like we are having a circle action.

After supper, we also went to PARKNSHOP to have our shopping. We had no plan when we got there, but after we saw the things, we began to lose our control, picked up this one, and then that one… The result was all of their wallets lose their weight. Though in this situation, I had good self-control, yet as they bought so much, I didn’t bought a little, it maybe seemed I was too stint. I had no choice but buying something too.

“无事出街少破财”,“眼不见为干净”看不见就不用买,不用买就不用心痛,虽然买的时候很高兴,但看到自己的帐加起来的那个数字,心里就很不顺。看来我真的太吝啬了,但一个月400块全包,我不吝啬,难道叫我月月都用老本吗?如果我是在外省读书,我的生活费会只有400吗?外省有像广州这样容易花钱的地方吗?外省我会那么熟悉吗?外省我可以经常回家只花3元吗?一切事物都有他的两面性,好,不好,由你自己决定,是十分主观的问题。

今天的班服再次投票,我的那个反应很臭,因为我的设计只是一个徽标,如果就那样一个东西在衣服正面,当然100%单调,无奈不可与别人的设计混在一起。开头的时候,的确对自己的东西不自信,但我越来越觉得我会为它自豪。我的亲生骨肉,我能不爱它吗?无论美丑,都是经过一番努力的成果,我可以不珍惜吗?我能不为自己的亲生骨肉自豪吗?相处久了,发觉自己越来越爱它。这叫不叫日久生情?正如同学的建议,如果在外面加一圈文字说明更完美,更像一个专业的标志,我真的爱四它了。于是就改成了下图:

我真的越来越爱我的“S形唱歌仔”了!

破财算得了什么,心有所属,不怕孤独,我有我个“唱歌仔”陪我,我什么都不怕!

2004-11
11

To be or Not To be

By xrspook @ 3:43:39 归类于:烂日记

It is a good thing or not? The P.E. classes today didn't need to test our 800-metre race, and today we just practiced and the next week is really our test. Do not have to run right now, it's a good thing, but I have to be afraid for one more week, and the feeling will be terrible the same, in this side, is it good?

We run 3 rounds today, it meant we had run 1200 meters. The feeling was not so bad, at first, we run very slowly, and the secondly, I thought run two rounds looked like better than run 4 rounds (if it's 200 meters per round). I could feel the breath was OK, or you could say it's very comfortable. Though I had run 1200 meters, but I was still here. I still could feel myself, I hadn't die. The tennis teacher asked us to run 1200 meters in this speed every other day until the test. I really want to, this time I feel jogging is not so bad, if I have some music, which will be better. But in fact, I won't do it, because of no playground, because of I don't want to get up so early, because, because, because… So many because. After today's practicing, I am not so afraid as I used to be.

真的觉得这个网球老师有很多话要说,很humor,每次下课几乎都要拖堂,都在讲一些医疗知识或他的亲身经历。有时在上课时说,有时在快下课时说,体育老师能有这种水平已经很不错了。上一次说他得了什么全身痛的病,北医的医生找不出原因,最后是被他爸治好了。再上一次说他见过他的标枪老师被“烤全羊”——腿被标枪穿透,变成残废的故事,这次就说他爬树看电影几乎摔死的故事。同时又针对快要跑800,教一些注意事项和对跑完后晕厥的处理办法。

为什么大学的体育课达标没有“实心球”呢?这么100%的项目它不考,考什么800米,臭死了。虽然标准已降低为4分10秒为达标,但心理还是不平衡。

今天又开班会,投票那些班服设计。我的那个反应也不错,最后可不可以成为现实还要经过很多风风雨雨。自己的设计被认同,原来感觉是这样,当然,这也是第一个完全由我自己设计的标志。

“塞翁失马,焉知非福”,800米没跑,好事?坏事?

2004-11
10

To be a Designer

By xrspook @ 2:50:48 归类于:烂日记

My class is going to make our own clothes and flag. So every dormitory must designs their owe one. “The fire burns high when everybody adds wood to it.” A united people are like a strong city fortification, everyone must do something for it.

I always thought to make “Food”, “Science”, “Three”, “Zero” and “Four” together in a sign to be our badge. Of course I must choose the first letters. In math classes, when the teacher was not speaking something, I would go to in my mind to unite those things together. I was not a professor designer; I hadn’t had any class about it before. The only thing I had was a warm heart, and a very pressing hope. After many times failed, I got an idea!
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The second one is my first designs, but it is void of the letter “S”, in fact, it is easier to understand. The first one is more activity. The shape of “S” hair, it’s very modern and meaningful.

And then we also must design four sentences to be our leading words: “超越自我,激励成功”,”Just do it”,”‘食’力无限,’品’劲十足”,”活力无限食工(3)”. The second I repeated we are not the professor of advertisement designers, so the sign and the words maybe also terrible and can’t bring to the others, but sincerely, they are all made by us in heart. Also, we wrote a Fido Dido in the back of the clothes (the 7 up’s model) in his (Fido Dido) shirt, we will write our number. At first we want to write some Chinese character in the right and downs side of the shirt, but you know, the Chinese character are too difficult to write, so at last, though we had such design, we gave up.

不明白为什么我的设计总是那么死板,那么烂,全是刚劲没有半点温柔,即使有温柔的地方我也打算改掉。我到底还是不是女生?为什么我的设计就会如此的奇怪呢?一个像在唱歌的男人,除了包含了“F,S,T,O,四”五个基本元素外其余没有一丝特殊含义,而且总体看上去很怪,为什么?为什么?为什么我会想这些东西?

明天就有体育课了,真的很怕跑800,很怕,很怕怕,真的很怕怕。又不会不合格,我也不知怕什么,我真是一个十分怕辛苦的人,真的吃不了苦。谁又会心甘情愿的主动去吃苦啊!又有谁一点都不怕累啊!

又一次证明,我是一个没什么好设计意念的人。肯定当不了设计师了。

2004-11
9

Cloudy Day Made Me Upset

By xrspook @ 2:40:00 归类于:烂日记

I like the sun is shining, and the birds are singing, and then my happiness is coming. I don’t like cloudy day, it made me think about poor things or boring things.

The rainy day I also don’t very enjoy. But as I live in Guangzhou, I have to face it every year. In the cloudy and wet day, everywhere is in cold and moist, you almost can smell mold just around you. The fortunate thing is that the climate in Guangzhou is not Mediterranean Climate. The summer is hot and dry, but the winter is cold and wet. This kind of climate appears in J.Z. Coetzee & Garcia Márquez stories, just when I read them, I hate that weather, and it makes heavy and me upset.

It is a long time that I haven’t seen rain here. A lot of places are too dry to grow crops and food, thought I don’t like raining, in heart, I really hope it rain. The cloudy day let me feel, as I can’t breath, it’s so suppress. When the English class was going, I heard “sha”, and then looked out of windows, it rained at last. It’s the second I met rain in South China Agricultural University. The first I was still in military training, and that experience was so terrible, but this time, I just needed to sit in the classroom and shared the moment.

今天的风好象大了,天真的凉了吗?昨天的蚊子弄得我无法入睡。为什么广州的秋天看不到黄叶纷飞,却见雨了呢?什么秋高气爽,怎么我没有一点感觉?树叶没黄,因为五山公寓这里连一棵大点的树都没有,地上的草全黄了,不知是不堪8000多人的践踏还是因为开始它们秋天的新衣,正准备着冬天的休息,然后决定明春再闯一番新事业呢?它们有如此长远的计划,但我却没有,我连明天要干什么,为什么要干,怎么干都不知道。 我没有“I want it that way” instead I have no way in my brain.

The wind is bigger, the rain is heavily, but my brain-storm hasn’t come.我不是幻想家,绝对绝佳的设计理念,甚至我连自己都预测不到。如果要用一种颜色形容今天,一定是灰色,没有重点,没有激越,没有脾气,没有欢乐,什么都没有,“xrspook in the middle”,是一种不死不活,不上不下,不左不右的状态。

今天,是一个同学的生日,昨天努力的查字典,学会了一句西文¡Feliz cumpleceños!—Happy birthday!到此为止第一句为用而学的西文。

Cloudy day, upset me.

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