我的天

What a bad weather today! Since I knew 2006-03-23 has been, it rain continuously. Sometime it’s very terrible, and some was smooth. In the wake of this, my English teacher was late in her class for about 15 minutes, though she had left her home 20 minutes than everyday. Because of the bad weather, the buses was blocked on the road, and the text driver  refused to came to our teaching area here, for there’s a little big "river" came out in the road to here. So many unusual things broke out in one time, so my teacher had to face with the reality that she had to be late.

It’s bad thing for some of us, however, in such situation, the others felt very happy. That’s because they didn’t have to have P.E. class anymore, the reason is their class was going on in the open air. What a poor thing, the good advantage now turned into bad trouble to me. My class was carried out in gymnasium! No matter what weather, even though cat and dog weather, we should go there to continual our badminton class. My choice decided my road is different from others, and even has more ups and downs.

Today, we had seen the light in gymnasium finally, for the nature sunlight was no enough. In fact, I don’t think so, the situation was more or less as usual, and maybe that’s the strange feeling of our teacher. I didn’t know what the outside was going on since I lose myself in play badminton. The ball came and went, stayed in the sky and then dropped on the floor, in this way, we enjoyed two classes there. Our teacher taught us how to cut the ball today. Maybe now we have learned something skill about how to move our wrist, so the movement seemed easier than before. Nevertheless, you should know you are still a green hand still now, and in a long time you will always still in such level…

Tomorrow is Friday, the end of this week. How times fly! Next Saturday, the NCRE (National Computer Rank Examination) will arrive. A good thing or a bad news, that’s depending on you!

一天都做实验真的很要命，不是说动手这事情很难，但33人挤在一个实验室用着那些又烂又残的仪器，然后做实验的时候声音可以说是震耳欲聋，我是其中一个“大声婆”，因为我真的无法忍受同学某些完全因为没有看书或者没有听讲而犯下的不可原谅的错误。于是就控制不了自己的音量……

我从开始就想把实验做好。无论是食品微生物的还是食品化学的，在做实验之前我真的有很认真的看过书，不懂不清楚的地方真的有去查过相关资料，但事实告诉我那还远远不够。因为有太多太多的未知因素了，除了我的水平太低，没有预料到我可能犯的错误以外还有很多很多仪器的缺陷。仪器不精确，我们根本就不能做出正确的答案，更何况要做出让我满意的答案？！无论我看书多么仔细，我总是做不到我预想的效果……

真的觉得我的食品化学综合实验的老师——沈**不是一个称职的老师。不单理论课上说废话，还要在实验课的时候玩失踪。看看他的资料；

好像很厉害的样子，但事实远没有文章里的那么好。也许他是那总会学不会教的人吧。每次实验就派2个研究生师兄，然后自己从开始到最后都不知道跑到哪里去了。我们成不成功根本仿佛和他无关。我们遇到的困难他根本不会在乎，因为他根本就不在场，不知道！而师兄的质量则是因人而异，今天连写在黑板的实验流程也看得我们十分辛苦，因为字实在太丑了！怎么这就是研究生！这就是我们的核心课！什么专业？简直就是过场！！！！

为什么现在的大学生素质如此低下，问问基层的老师吧，问问学生自己是如何做实验的！

我仍记得妈告诉我的一句话：“无论别人做实验如何随便，你自己也不能对自己随便。”没有规矩，没有严格，没有条规根本就做不好科学。我们需要的不是松散，我们需要的不是过场。我是有心学的，但我无能为力。不知道还有多少像我这样的大学生，多少兴致就是这样被抹杀。反正，这就是现代教育，这就是普及教育，这就是扩招，这就是社会的大趋势……

不知道还有多少次过场，什么时候才是我们有板有眼做主角？

Because of some incorrect decision the past, China has to carry out birth control since 1980s. Maybe the people around I have to fall in the same situation — have to be alone. We have no brother or sister, after the parents have gone to work, we have to be solitary.

I was learning the essay "Choose to Be Alone on Purpose" in the English class today. It’s talking about the people devote himself to loneliness, and are very enjoy that moment. During reading, I was really confused. They did their best to get away from others in purpose, in this way to inspirit their feel especially for poets and philosophers. They create atmosphere to be alone, however, I have to face the solitude by myself time after time. Why? Can’t they enjoy the day with family or friends? It’s very happiness that you have someone to talk to. What the poets they write for? The Nature? The theory of life? Without people to share the poets or theory, all of them will lose their shine, and become no use. In short, I personally thinking that we don’t work for God or ourselves, we live for others. The reason we still here in the world is to make it better for others. Can’t we get away from them?!

In my opinion, though many people were alone, they are divorced, widowed or even live in the woods which is far from other. They are not solitude. Solitude is a feeling that you feel very depress because of alone. No body wants to be solitude, for that’s a bad emotion for us. Nevertheless, we could enjoy the moment when we are alone. For this, we could stretch out our soul until it fills up the whole room, and use your freedom, coming and going as you please without apology.

As everybody known, the population of the earth was blooming, the place of everybody was reducing second by second. Could you find a place where you are alone? In such situation, did the poets and philosophers can think out and new idea anymore? We should change as time goes by.

Solitude is not where we expected to be, but for the time being we might as well go home. Anyway, there is no place like home.

Today is the fifth week of this semester, so it means after this today, the food microbiology classes will appear just once a week, however I don’t know why I can’t feel any happiness from it. Yesterday, I didn’t a thing that I had never done before — selling myself, showing my shining point in front of others. Before that, I had no idea about being appreciated because my selling. Yet, I made up my mind to do it. I was surely that when I did it, I was full of confident, and never thought I would lose. There is no phenomenon that I would lose! Nevertheless, it happened! Maybe I should evaluate myself completely again. In my opinion, in some point I had done my best, I thought I was better than others, but, it’s just the idea of myself. What a shame! I did it: http://top10.blogbus.com/logs/2006/12/1084349.html, and I lose it. Hey girl, don’t be silly, please! There is nothing you should forgive; you have done a great job now! You should believe that you are the best, no matter what the others think! You’re blog was not showing here: http://top10.blogbus.com/logs/2006/03/2098917.html you must be here: http://top10.blogbus.com/ one day!

I think my food chemistry experiment teacher have talked about useless a lot today. The thing we had just learned from the theory class of food chemistry he repeated them again. Because of this, he didn’t have enough time to teach us the thing we should reap in the very class. Hey, my teacher, don’t be silly, please! From such kinds of thing, we could see, the communication between teachers was far from enough. They should know well that what other teacher have taught, in this way, we could save a lot of time, and their job would be easy, too. The teacher of food chemistry experiment and the teacher of food chemistry are in the same food college, and even in the office beside each other. It seems that the geography gap is not the most important problem; they should be close to in their mind!

A bad news, and a criticism, that’s the story of this day. Hope both of us won’t be silly again.

如果妈在从龙川县回来的时候依然从事她中专的工作，那么一切都似乎会改变了。我的爸爸很有可能不是现在的爸爸（但如果这样算的话大概就不会有xrspook在写这个blog了）。妈的工作可能是在某个高校做实验员或者在石油集团当检验员。那么我小时候去的地方就不是黑暗嘈杂的机床车间，妈也不会是那里的班长，没有从车间的水塘里捞上来的蝌蚪，没有那股我觉得挺好闻的机油味，妈的脸上也没有被无可避免的车床非出来的碎屑弄出来的疤痕，我不会在那个工厂里面学自行车，也没有去那个工厂幼儿园的机会，没有在那里的舞厅追逐灯光的日子……没有，没有，很多很多都不会有了。

没有小时候妈分配的屋子，没有现在住的屋子，一切一切都没有了。我将走上一条完全不同的道路。我将不会在南边路小学就读，不会在广州市一零八中学过最最草根的日子。也许不会说粗话，也许不会练就喝汽水打嗝的才能，没有那种亦师亦友的关系，没有那两个比较假的市优秀学生奖项，不会有那种鹤立鸡群被老师宠爱的日子，大概现在也不会在华农的宿舍里用ADSL写blog。也许我压根儿就不知道什么叫做《丑女贝蒂》，我对西班牙语的认识和对法语的认识一般一点不懂……不会，不会，一切都似乎不会如此发生。

大概我小时候常去的是妈的实验室，那些白大褂，那些各色的玻璃器皿将是我童年最熟悉的东西。也许我那时就已经是滴定或者蒸馏的高手，或者我最喜欢的是玩那些已经倒好的平板……大概，大概，有太多的大概，太多太多的不确定因数。

也许我的爸爸是某个教授，起码也是副教授或者工程师吧。大概从小我就被迫学那些高深莫测的数学和外语。但我肯定，如果我有别的父亲的话，他肯定会在我出生的前20年送至少一个礼物给我。也许小时候听的故事就不是中国古代的故事而是那些科学家的故事或者那些最高新的科学技术。那么也许现在的xrspook就不会对科学技术感兴趣而觉得那些文学方面的东西更有味了。也许从小学我就是进名校，每天的工作就是不断地追赶，就在班级的最后几名之间浮浮沉沉。然后很危险地进入了那个名校的高中部然后又危颤颤地进入了有名的高校，然后继续过着最赶的日子……也许，也许，幸好这些也许都没有发生。我宁愿做一个鸡头也不愿做一个凤尾。

另一条路幸好并没有列入我人生的一部分。其实，到现在为止我的日子还过得不错，为什么还要为自己创造那么多如果呢？！知足者，长乐也！